So I was cleaning out my Google Drive the other day and came across this gem. I have no idea how old it is, but I’m glad I kept it. I’m sharing it with you, my followers, so you know how I’ll be contacting you when I want to stage my revolution (because what writer doesn’t have plans for a revolution?)
My revolution will be later entitled as: The Revolution of Justice. My followers will be called the Judges. I want that established before we continue. [In retrospect, you all will be called the Jury]
First I’ll spend a few years gathering a base of supporters. That’d be done by writing books that attract intelligent people. I’ll have no dumb minions in this revolution.
After I gather people who’d follow me to the ends of the earth, I’ll start publishing books that stir the fire of revolution in their hearts. I’ll recommend to my loyal readers not Les Miserables, but the Westmark Trilogy [by Lloyd Alexander. Read it. It’s awesome. Spoilers in the next sentence]. Both of these stories contain similar revolutions, but in the Westmark Trilogy the revolution succeeds.
I will meet my loyal readers face to face and whisper my plans to them. I’ll tell them to wait for my signal, and recommend that they keep up with the Marvel movies, a pop culture icon that would not seem suspicious to watch. From there, I would bribe and threaten, in a way that could never be traced to me, into being a writer for Marvel. [On second thought, maybe I SHOULDN’T share my evil plan…]
When the time comes for my followers to rebel, I will sneak the code into the script of the upcoming Marvel movie, a signal to act. As a single wave, my followers and I shall take over the world, eradicating all those who don’t want to read. Those who don’t wish to read or expand their mind have no place on this earth.
There you have it. Await my signal, Jury. Now if only I could snag a job for Marvel…